• Road Construction
  • Traffic
  • Chryslers/Dodges
  • Patchouli Oil
  • Die Hard Liberals
  • Die Hard Conservatives
  • Commercial Radio Disk Jockeys
  • McDonald’s
  • Processed Food Products
  • My Volvo
  • Acorns
  • People Who Brag About Being Vegetarians
  • People Who Aren’t Funny But Still Try (seriously, give it up)
  • The Metro Times
  • Bono
  • David Lynch
  • Oliver Stone
  • Kickers
  • Circuit City
  • Cowboy Hats
  • Trucker Hats
  • Sweatpants In Public (when not exercising)
  • People That Yell at Me to Ride My Bike on the
    Sidewalk (learn the law assholes)
  • Pop Music
  • Reality TV
  • Gay Marriage
  • Straight Marriage
  • Cruisers in the Left Lane
  • Chicken That’s Been Enhanced With Up To 15% Broth
  • Hippies
  • Goths
  • Punks Who Put in Way To Much Effort
  • Chachis
  • Chic Flicks
  • Shirts Tucked in Without a Belt
  • Chain Restaurants
  • Pretending to be Nice (that’s why I rarely do it)
  • Renaissance Fairs (there is nothing
    gayer than a renaissance fair)
  • People Who Look Down on Porn
  • People Who Champion Causes I Don’t Believe In
  • Flying
  • Bitches
  • Jewelry on Men (honestly, do we need this?)
  • Piercings (anywhere, on anyone, even ear rings)
  • Inspirational Posters
  • Working
  • The ‘Buy American’ People
  • Bad Advertisements
  • Crowds
  • Baseball
  • Soccer
  • Soccer
  • Soccer (I really hate soccer)
  • Spam (the food)
  • Spam (the internet scourge)
  • Asking a Girl For Her Number
  • First Dates
  • Trying to Awkwardly Go in for That First Kiss
  • Morrissey/Smiths
  • Bands with a Word and Number Combo That Means
    Nothing(Sum 41, Matchbox 20, Blink 182)
  • Leno
  • Losing My Hair
  • Ohio
  • Swimming in the Ocean
  • Local News
  • Last Call
  • Steven King
  • The DaVinci Code (I’m not going to read it okay?
    So stop recommending the fucker)
  • People Who Get Offended By Profanity (they’re just
    words. deal with it or fuck off)
  • Lifetime, Entertainment for Women
  • Blacking Out
  • Politically Correctness
  • People Magazine (do we really need this)
  • Trinity Broadcasting Network
  • Religious Fundamentalists (any religion)
  • Adamant Forceful Atheists
  • People Who Complain About Violence in Movies
  • Children at Meijer after 11:00 PM
  • People Way Too Into Anything (NASCAR,
    Golf, Lighthouse Miniatures)
  • Dance Clubs
  • ‘Clever’ Bumper Stickers (a true sign of mediocrity)
  • The Criminalization of Consensual Victimless Crimes
  • Whicker
  • Trend Magazines (Maxim, FHM, Stuff)
  • That Nick Lache Guy
  • Bus/Train Travel
  • People Who Don’t Get Up and Leave to Make a
    Call (a little courtesy people)
  • To Much Makeup
  • Sweetest Day
  • Puns
  • The Word ‘Extreme’ (especially when spelled Xtreme)
  • Turkey Bacon
  • White Chocolate
  • Absolut Vodka
  • Gift Certificates
  • Polo Shirts
  • Neon
  • Hewlett Packard
  • That Please Press 1…Please Press 2 Phone Shit
  • 'Artists'
  • That Thing Got a Hemi? (no, a 68 Cuda has a Hemi.
    you're Durango has an ad campaign.)
  • People who don’t know when to use your and you’re (get the irony?)
  • People that confuse irony with hypocrisy
  • People who don’t understand hot to use the cart coral
  • When your girlfriend reads your hate list and her home state is mentioned, making you look like an idiot. (what are the odds I would end up dating a girl from Ohio?)
  • All the various C.S.I. shows. Worst premise/dialogue ever
  • Oil leaks
  • Drunk strangers that want to be ‘friends’
  • People who turn their turn signals on at the very last minute
  • People who never turn their turn signals off
  • Michael Bay
  • Playing the puck instead of playing the man
  • The tangy zip of Miracle Whip
  • Re-reading this list so that I don’t enter duplicate items
  • People that confuse not being overtly evil with being a good person. To be a good person you need to do good things, not just avoid doing bad things
  • Losing an eBay auction in the last few seconds
  • Infomercials
  • The Blue Screen of Death
  • People that insist that you will like their baked beans, even though you have stated that you hate all baked beans
  • Fleas
  • Clogged drains
  • Debt
more to come